Chengdone

I’m pretty sure that I don’t have a good grasp on Chengdu. And only part of that is because I’m pretty sure the taxi drivers all speak a long-forgotten Asian dialect of Whatthefuckian. Ok, it’s not that bad, but I don’t even have a good grasp on the accent. It’s not nearly as mockable to be as say, Shanghainese.

Coolest guy in Zhaojue Temple standing for a photo

So the city. I’ve walked around a pretty good swath of it. Lots of wonderful parks and temples. I absolutely love them. One genius move is that they’ve put teahouses in all the parks (and temples, and back alleyways. Someone tried to open a teahouse in my bathroom yesterday evening). All this teahousing seems to foster a nice ‘sit down and chat’ vibe which I really like. Quite social. And this is from the king of anti-socialstan.
Dancing on a weekday afternoon in People's Park

As a side note, one of the things I find so funny about China is that each city has what seem like officially sanctioned stereotypes that absolutely eeeeevryone must tell you about. I would bet good money that a cousin of the same bored tour guide who told me “above there’s heaven, but below we have Suzhou and Hangzhou” haunts Chengdu saying over and over again, “The pace of Chengdu is slower than other cities on the coast.” I really should start collecting these gems. The thing is, it seems to be true. Chengdu seems to operate on something akin to island time. I wonder if there are a phalanx of go-getters here in the city who force themselves to slow down so as not to mess with the city’s slogan.

Another thing I really like about the city is that there seem to be very very few foreign fast food places here. Now, I’m a hypocrite here. I eat a lot of western fast food when I’m in China. They’re fast, open at all hours and there’s generally a good bathroom inside, but that doesn’t mean I particularly like them. I think I’ve only seen two McDonalds and the same number of Starbucks – both in very touristy areas. Other than that, there’s not much at all. I should say that I haven't had any of the specialties this trip (unless you count Mapo Tofu). I've had Chengdu hotpot before, but it's kind of embarrassing to order hotpot for one.

Stinky Tofu seller on the street - the sign says "Stinkiest Tofu in the World." It really stank.

My trip.
My time in Chengdu didn’t start well. I flew in late (again) and showed up at the hotel later (because they made me check my roller-bag: grrr.), so my room had been given away and the hotel was now full, natch. (I just read that, and I’m not sure I want to be the kind of guy who writes ‘natch,’ but there it is on the screen. I think I’ll leave it.) Anyway, they booked me in at another place further out from the city center and all was well. I mention this story because I have a sinking feeling it will happen again in Chongqing. I’m coming in on a lateish train. I tried to tell the hotel folks I’ll be late, but I think they need a domestic credit card to hold the room. Eh.

The Pandas.

"adorably evil tools of Chinese imperialism. Black and white godless killing machines of bamboo." -Winnie

Cute. Insaaaanely cute and cuddly. But I have to admit I’m a little torn about the panda craze. It’s one of those ‘we save only the cute animals’ things. Pandas are pretty much at the end of their evolutionary road and we’re extending it because they’re cute. Now granted, we’re the ones who’ve obliterated their homes and the only places they could have bred naturally if they had an inclination to do so, but, well, they don’t seem that interested. Like those Otaku shut-ins that marry characters from their video games, maybe it wouldn’t be a bad thing to let Darwin win. Or maybe start an Otaku breeding program. They could have a center in Akihabara and tourists could come over and watch them act completely uninterested in non-ditigal beings of the opposite sex.
Lazy bastard. Probably on welfare too.

Ok ok, I’m not saying we should let the pandas die off. And I know there is a massive financial and PR incentive for China to support cute-animal tourism. I’m just saying it seems a little overboard sometimes. I mean seriously, the little dudes are only mobile for about a couple of hours when they eat, then they sleep the rest of the day. They’re like undergrads, for gods sake.
That, and they really are so frikkin’ cute. Seriously. Just look at this guy:


Aaaaaahh!!! The cuteness is overwhelming! I can't help it!